While conflict can be difficult to deal with because it involves change, sometimes it can seem like a threat to the relationships involved. Let me explain briefly. Sometimes an Individual wants to make things work and the other person in conflict says they want the same thing, but only on their terms.
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Although the other person wants it only on their terms, they do not state it verbally, but behaviorally, or they may come to a verbal agreement but do not display the behavior or actions of the agreement. They may even forcefully state their demand upon the other Individual. This is not conflict resolution, it is manipulation, therefore making the conflict unresolvable. This may have a note of behaviorism, which is a theoretical approach that seeks to explain behavior in terms of learning principles, but without reference to inner states, thoughts, or feelings of the person who does want to work cooperatively and even in the one who just wants to work everything together for the good. (Baumeister & Bushman)
In other words, it is as James 4:1 states: What is causing all the quarrels and fights among you? Isn’t it your desires battling inside you? (Complete Jewish Bible, Stern) While many different avenues could be approached, and addressed such as Parental Alienation, PTSD, normal family conflict, and many others, I want to direct our attention to a man of whom it is said, his life (book) is about the suffering of men, although it was really a conflict within Job and between Job and God. The conflict, I believe we’ll discover was not a misunderstanding, nor coming to an understanding, but rather an understanding that it is normal to not understand (at times), but to trust and for God to reveal more of Himself, not only to those who hear, but who will look. Nagy, and Wolf outline a good source of possible strategies which may also become visible in the life of Job and his confrontations even with God.
In the normal course of life, When a dispute arises, often the best course of action is negotiation to resolve the disagreement. (Nagy, Wolf) The goals of negotiation are: To produce a solution that all parties can agree to: To work as quickly as possible to find this solution: To improve, not hurt, the relationship between the groups in conflict. (Nagy, Wolf) These were all evident, or became evident in the struggle of Job.
Conflict is often from a perceived disparity between at least two individuals, however, at times within the person themselves which may become the causation for an individuals’ behavior socially toward another or their own mental dilemma rooted within. Sometimes it is a misunderstanding of wrestling not against flesh and blood,
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